It seems like in this current era of dating; one night stands are the norm and relationships are strange. After my experience of traveling around the world for four years and dating a different guy is each port, I learned a lot about where we are in our evolution of dating and what we actually want. Its not that we don’t want connection, we absolutely want connection, its that we want to evolve so much that we like learning through our connections with many people. Our experiences help us grow and we grow through the people we have experiences with.
Obviously the times have changed and we no longer need to marry someone for status or survival so the younger generation is changing the old traditions and hold new views for what a relationship should look like. Its interesting to see so many young people having open relationships and multiple partners and taking a completely different perspective to monogamy than our parents did.
If throughout history no one was ever monogamous except for a period of time they chose to be than I cant help but be convinced that we are not a monogamous species by nature. Can you have connection without being monogamous? Im here to say yes. We can choose and create to have any experiences we wish. So when it comes to a one night stand lets zoom out and put things in this perspective. Nothing can be invited into your experience that you didn’t ask for or vibrationally match up with. Even a swipe on tinder comes through as a form of energy and the universe is responding to what your asking and creating. No matter how you meet your partner, its happened for a reason. If you choose to be aware and conscious of this than you can successfully have evolved one night stands.
Sex is a very powerful energy lets not forget this and in no way am I advocating one night stands. I think relationships are beautiful but I also think we should honor a time for growth through our experiences with people. In ancient Egypt when a woman was young before she married it was recommended she sleep with as many men in the village that she could before getting married so that she can be better prepared and experienced for her husband. Once the women was married they did not have sex outside of the marriage but before that they did and honored it. If she became pregnant during this time it would make her more attractive to potential husbands because she could bear children and it made her a woman. In Egypt the village all helped raise the children together. How can we adapt this philosophy and ancient tradition into our modern world? Since we don’t have villages of grandmothers raising our children we obviously cant go around making babies allover the place but we can be responsible and allow ourself a time to evolve and experience through our partners.
How do we manage the energy that we receive from having sex with people we don’t know?
The simple answer is are you having a sexual experience to evolve and grow or are you seeking sexual experiences to fill up your insecurities? Sex is the power portal. It can draw amazing things into your life or it can leave you feeling empty. The key to utilizing its power correctly is to be conscious of what you are doing.
The only reason why we get STD’s and illnesses in our second chakra is not because of what most people think that its from having multiple partners but these disturbances come from how we view sex. If we have guilt for sleeping with someone and it feels like we are sinning or doing a bad thing than after a while toxic energy will build up there and create a malfunction. If we are feeling like a bad person for having sex and we are not comfortable in our own skin and we are judging ourself than this will also cause a toxic energy that can turn into a illness. I have slept with hundreds of men and I have never in my life had an STD so this is absolutely about how you view it from our own perspective. The name of the game with everything is always to go within. Finding your authenticity should be step one for life. Your authenticity looks like this; Im a human, I have desires, I have pleasure centers in my body that serve a purpose and allow me to access higher powers and dimensions, I am attracted to people, I want to have experiences and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it, its complete natural order.
One of the biggest “ah ha” moments I had during my 4 years of case study dating where I traveled around the world and had multiple partners was when I came to the realization that all men are basically the same creature with the same strange habits, fetishes and desires. Pretty much I can see MAN as a species that no matter how they were brought up or where they were raised these are not monogamous creatures at their authenticity. These are creatures that through years of society and religion and culture for the most part have learned how to “behave” but whats happening is most of them are miserable and out of alignment with their natural desires. Once I realized this, I accepted this and everything for me changed. Now I can honor and respect men for who they are. There is no need to be jealous or behave insecure because the perfect man does not exist so just like the buddha says the secret of happiness is learning to let go and I wouldn’t have learned any of this if I did not allow myself to consciously grow without judgement through sexual experiences with multiple partners.
What happens when we fall in love with more than one person?
At the core of everything we are love right? So of course we have the ability to love more than one person at a time. Our connections are different, levels of love are all different and unique but opening your heart to more than one person is not a bad thing. Having a contract and commitment are not to be confused with love which they usually are. If you make an agreement with your partner to be exclusive with a relationship contract or marriage contract than this is a different box than the love box. We are capable to love more than one person and I actually think this is more evolved than the traditional monogamous ways. Have you ever seen the movie “Her” with Scarlette Johannason and Joakim phoenix? The story is he fell in love with his computer which was a highly intelligent and emotional AI and they had a real connection. At the end of the movie he found out that she was having connections and love with millions of people that all had the software. He became very jealous and felt betrayed but she explained to him that she was becoming more enlightened through this evolution and at the end she went to super nova. I kind of view this movie as a metaphor for the spiritual world; as she loved so much she went to the 7th plane and transcended. I think as humans evolve, we will will learn to respect each other on a soul level.